Are you waiting for your life to begin?

If so, today is your lucky day. I’m going to provide you with a blessing:
A smack in the back of the head.

I always wanted to achieve success and happiness in life. I wanted to be a bestselling author. I wanted to travel the world and open myself to the influences of the wider world around me. I wanted to be bold and fearless and take the world by the balls and make it beg for my attention.

At the same time, I sat at my menial, low-paying jobs and dreamed about the day when someone - anyone - would offer me my big break or my dream career and my salary. “You’re amazing,” they would say, “We want to hire you.” I would set my own employment terms, work from home a few days a week, and enjoy life as as writer. People would pay me to just be my own brilliant self. Boy, did I have a lot to learn.

It took some pretty tough self awareness experiences to realize the following:

I always wanted to be a writer. I wanted to create beautiful compositions which would thrill or horrify my readers. Yet I didn’t practice writing.

I always wanted to be an artist. I wanted to draw and paint and learn how to convey ideas and feelings using a variety of media. I had a ton of art supplies, yet I didn’t practice making art.

I always wanted to travel, yet I married a person who felt the best vacation was one spent in the same destination with the same people, each and every year.

Instead of doing things I loved, I made decisions that took me further from my goals. As a result, I wasted an awful lot of time.

Very soon, I realized that my metaphorical ship was not coming in. It wasn’t even on its way. It was sitting in pieces at the shipyard, waiting for someone to put it together. That someone would have to be me.

With this realization, I started where I could: the library.

I picked up countless books on writing, art, history, and a variety of other topics. I checked out cookbooks, memoirs, novels, and novellas. I borrowed books about personal and career development, art history, civil rights, human rights, economics, efficiency, and everything in between. I absorbed everything like a sponge and became an effective (if slightly annoying) proponent of reading for personal growth.

At the same time, I realized I wanted to be a professional writer, but no one would give me a shot without a portfolio. I decided not to leave my future as a writer up to other people. Instead, I decided to do it my damn self.

I began a book review blog for two purposes: to inspire my readers to read more books, and to give myself writing “assignments,” with deadlines for completion of books and posts. That small step in the right direction took me further than I could have ever imagined. One opportunity led to the next, and eventually I found myself interviewing for a writer’s position on a marketing team. In addition to some small editorial pieces, I included printouts of my blog posts in my portfolio. I got the job.

I didn’t stop there. I worked on my other goals, little bits at a time.

Ten years later, I am divorced and engaged to be married for a second time. I write for a living. I am an artist. I am learning to read, write, and speak French. I finished my master’s degree last year. I write for Medium. I recently picked up yoga and bullet journaling. Every new achievement gives me confidence, experience, and new opportunities. In its simplest form, success is defined as the accomplishment of an aim or purpose. I have discovered how to do what I set out to do.

Here is your wake-up call:
YOU are the only person who can make any long term difference in YOUR life.

If you are curious about something, follow that curiosity to see where it leads.

If you have a natural talent for something, practice and cultivate that talent. It could turn into the basis for your career.

If you get a taste for something you love, start doing that thing more often.

Stop daydreaming.

Stop letting time pass you by.

Stop letting other people define how and where you will grow.

START putting in the work to get where you want to be.

If you enjoyed this piece, please follow Esther Curtis, MSM-HCA on Twitter @ejhcurtis.