Gillian Barnes

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10 Life-Changing Lessons from Quarantine That Will Add Value to Your Life by James Murphy (@mutabilisblog)

The incredible toilet roll hunt seems like a distant memory; the hysteria and panic have found equilibrium and face masks have become a standard component of our daily outfits!  

Just six months ago, when the world was stock-piling toilet paper, and opportunists were hoarding supplies of antibacterial gel, it felt like the required adjustments that would help us to navigate this pandemic were too much to ask.  

As the world came to a grinding halt, a question hung in the air, as invisible as the virus:

What will become of us?

As a confessed introvert, it was quite easy for me to go outside just once per day to take my three dogs for their walk around the local park. I welcomed not having to masquerade as an extrovert, and I loved that I had an excuse to avoid small talk in the supermarket!

My partner, however, felt like a caged animal.  

It wasn't long before the words we exchanged became charged with tension, and a quick scroll through social media established that this was a phenomenon occurring in most, if not all, homes.  

People lost their jobs, record numbers of people applied for low-income benefits and the self-employed have had a particularly arduous journey.

In the UK, remarkably, we adjusted.  

Employers embraced flexibility, and workers showed patience, even the government hacked at their bureaucracy, providing more efficient processes.

Ten life-changing lessons from quarantine that will add value to your life!

As the months have passed, I have identified ten, actually loads more than ten, lessons that will benefit us for years to come—if we remember them!

The NHS is outstanding.

Too often, we take the NHS for granted in the UK, and this pandemic has demonstrated the true worth of this vital asset. Furthermore, in recognising the contribution of the key and core workers, it became clear that the sheer size and variety of the workforce is dizzying.  

It was heartwarming to see the rainbows appear in windows, and the first time I heard the clapping my whole body erupted in goose-pimples. As I hung out of my bedroom window, I couldn't help but beam from ear to ear as I added my clap to the thunderous applause.

When, or if, things get back to 'normal' and you find yourself in a waiting room that seems to be moving at a snail's pace, or perhaps a referral to see a specialist takes longer than expected, remember that you're dealing with these celebrated people that deserve our patience, respect and gratitude.

Take a moment too, to acknowledge those countries that don't have Universal Healthcare.

Living in a state of chaos is unnecessary.

Nobody is immune to the addictive poison that is, What If?

Every journey, act, event, plan and goal can fall victim to this relentless thief of joy, by way of overthinking. Nobody saw this pandemic coming; it swept across the globe at an alarming pace of indiscriminate contagion. 

Yet we adjusted, implemented and adapted.

The truth is that none of us knows what the future holds, even probability is unreliable, so embracing that existence is continuously changeable and being responsive to changes will lead to a much calmer state of being.

Resisting change will only lead to pain.

Moaning is as soul-destroying as it is useless.

The thing about common sense is that it's common, not complete.

Of course, there will always be those on the margins that refuse to conform, even after being informed. The conspiracy-theorists, rebels, attention whores and the plain stupid will always be a part of the conversation, and they're entitled to be so.

Pay attention to what you pay attention to because for every one nonconformist; hundreds are doing the right thing. Make sure that you see the real picture, not just what you can see.

So next time you're at the supermarket, and some obnoxious chap is without a face mask, remember that it's not your job to quality control the human species. The same applies to all areas of life.

Be where your feet are!

Pre-March everybody was so busy! Wake up to make a coffee whilst thinking about taking a shower, only to be in the shower and thinking about the journey to the office.  

Always in a different place, mentally, than physically.

It's such a shame not to relish the scent, and feel of your body wash in the shower because you're thinking about a much less enjoyable commute to work.  

Quarantine has given us all a licence to slow down and have the mind in the same place as the body.  

Next time you make your morning coffee, or tea, listen to the rolling boil of the kettle and delight in the smell whilst your fingers stroke the texture of the cup and look for the wisps of steam rising from the hot liquid.

Identify and communicate clear boundaries.

The rush of the commute combined with the fabric of social constructs that we get wrapped up in can lead to boundaries becoming unclear, ignored and crossed.  

In every workplace or team, there is a person that lacks any understanding of personal space, and they seem to get away with rubbing everyone up the wrong way as a result of these pesky social constructs.

Now is the time to identify what you need to be the calmest, most engaged, and adaptable person that you can be - then explicitly state this to those around you.

To expect the office and home experiences to echo is irrational, being that there are so many people to consider. Be reasonable; the trick is to create an environment for yourself and not to manipulate the entire situation.

Know what you're about, and be about it.

At the risk of making myself sound like a new-age witch, intentions determine outcomes, so make sure you know what yours are, for sure.

Different from a goal, which is an achievement or consequence, the intention is the specific reason or purpose for the action.  

For example; to create an influencer platform for financial gain is an intention whilst a supporting goal could be to accumulate ten thousand followers.

The big one to work out is your life-intention; which is remarkably simple when one crucial fact is clarified:  passion is the result of an action, not the cause of it.

Suspend the 'rules', by that I mean the boring stuff like salary, mortgage payment, bills; it's just how things work etc. and think back to when you were asked as a kid what you were going to be when you grew up.

If you still want that, what's stopping you?

If you don't, what do you want to do with the unknown amount of life that you have left?

Only when you know what you're about, can you be about it!

We don't need as much as we seem to think we need.

Until around ten thousand years ago, almost all humans were nomadic hunter-gatherers. Living the life of a traveller meant having few if any, possessions.

When the first humans settled and started tending crops, the accumulation of material possessions behaviour took hold. As manufacturing and technology have advanced, this has become dangerous and destructive for our planet.  

Sure, it can sometimes feel like 'eco-friendly' is a stick that we get beat with when we buy the cheaper detergent, forget to take our reusable carrier or opt for single-use plastic - but the fact remains that there is a resource crisis and we could all do better.

The truth is that humans need very little to maintain life, and there is more than enough to go around. That urge you feel to hoard toilet roll is nothing more than a hangover from the prehistoric nomad days—so resist!

Debunk the myth of scarcity.

The incredible toilet paper rush, bear with me, can teach us a valuable lesson about human behaviour. Your primal brain is catastrophic by nature; when your brain gets a 'peckish' signal from the stomach, your mind creates another message to get you to eat - it screams that if you don't eat now, you'll die.

There is also a cognitive bias whereby the rate of uptake of beliefs, ideas, fads and trends increases in line with the proportion of others who have already done so.

It's called the bandwagon effect.  

The toilet paper hunt gained momentum because the primal brain was screaming dramatically, and the cognitive bias sought to calm it down.

Understanding that scarcity is a myth makes way for the 'sensible' frontal cortex of the brain to employ reason, problem-solving and impulse control to determine a course of action that is better for the greater good.

In a nutshell, you'll feel safe enough to share.

Continue to get out in nature!

It's hardly surprising that nature has a relaxing effect on us humans, frazzled as we are by our technology, systems, processes, constructs, rules and concepts.

Science endeavours to replicate nature, so when there is a disturbance, anomaly, or failure, the first place to look for a solution is in our natural environment.

I remember, with the horror of a true introvert, how many people were suddenly in the park where I walked my dogs every day. We had been walking there for five years and rarely saw another person, but this pandemic drove people outside.  

What stood out most, to me, was how relaxed these people were, the natural smiles of couples, families and friends surrounded by nature and walking, playing football, riding bikes and siblings playing together.

Do yourself a favour and ditch the devices at least once every day, and revel in the wonder of nature.

Lighten Up!

Relax! Nothing is under control.

We all use our systems, beliefs and habits to give order to the chaos that is life, and sometimes it works. Routines trick us into predicting outcomes, and we willingly ignore the fact that the occurrence of an event comes with no guarantee of repeat.

Lighten your emotional load, lighten your physical load, lighten your social load and lighten your material load.

All that stuff is weighing you down.

It's also essential to find a way to laugh, every day.

As things increasingly loosen, we have the perfect opportunity to live with intention, determining our own desired outcomes.

What lessons has this modern time taught you? Tell me in the comments.

If you enjoyed this piece, please follow James Murphy on Twitter @mutabilisblog