Lately, all I want to write about, directly and indirectly, is my daughter. This is one of those indirect times. Many Millennials like myself and my husband got a late start in life and are just now, in our mid to late thirties, starting families. Well, let me tell you…there are some things that none of the sentimental Mommy bloggers are going to tell you and they have helped me get my life back. Today, I’m going to share some of them with you so that you can feel (somewhat) in control post-birth.
Side note–what is with those women who run those blogs? There are videos of them in full makeup slowly waking in the morning looking like they fell out of Vogue, lazily reaching over to say hello to their quiet, demure infant, while serenely sipping a latte. Yeah okay, I totally believe that the tips this woman is writing will help. Especially when they are things like “sleep when your baby sleeps”--woman, please! If I slept when my baby slept all the time I would get literally NOTHING done. But I digress…and no, I don’t harbor secret hate for Moms who blog, just some of them that write overblown puffery…those women have live-in help.
Get Your A** Up
I have always hated mornings. Prior to the birth of my baby, I was literally the person who needed to have a large cup of coffee pushed toward me before I resembled anything less than horror itself. However, after Mirabelle was born, I realized that mornings are the only time I have that offers silence.
I have not been able to do this every day yet…but on the mornings when I can, I feed my baby at four or five, then I rock her to sleep, pop her in the pack n’ play, turn her camera on, and…ready, steady, GO! I am able to wash any dishes I have left in the sink (fun fact–don’t do that either), brew fresh coffee, cook myself a healthy breakfast, do 20 minutes worth of yoga, and even write a bit before she wakes up for her eight or nine o’clock feeding.
By that time, if you are like me, you will be starting traditional work, so just think what a wonderful groundwork you’ll be laying for your day (also, if your baby feeds at eight they will very possibly go back down for a few hours or at least remain happy for those hours while you work!)
The 1-5 Minute Rule
I think I saw this marketed as a one-minute rule on a reel, but I’ve modified it to extend to five. The basic premise is that if you can accomplish a task in one to five minutes, do it. Don’t waste time thinking of larger things…just do the little ones. Also, do as many little ones as you can and trust me, they add up.
Toss in a load of laundry (or switch it to the dryer), wash a few bottles, take out the recycling and trash, grab the mail, clean the litter box–none of these tasks take a lot of time, but ignoring them results in hours of chores. Dedicate one to five minutes several times a day and watch your life change.
Everything In Its Place
I feel like some people struggle with this more than others. I remember distinctly that my stepmum would frequently impress upon me the value of putting things where they belonged…which I just as frequently ignored. Guess what, she knew something I didn’t (not the first time, won’t be the last!
Picture this…you come into the house and kick your shoes across the room instead of placing them on the rack, then you run to the kitchen to fix yourself a snack and you leave a frying pan on the stove, the kitchen spray out of the cabinet along with a balled-up paper towel on the counter, then you run upstairs and toss your dirty clothes on the floor instead of in the hamper.
And now imagine the next day…you wake up late and immediately race downstairs to make breakfast, the pan you need is dirty and though it is right in front of your face, the cooking spray is out of place, and in your panic, it takes extra time to find. You hastily wash the pan and burn the eggs, leaving a task for later, yet again. More trash accumulates and you begin to think about what to wear. You run to your bedroom, where the floor is covered in yesterday’s clothes, which you trip over. You grab your outfit and ignore the items again…that’s a tomorrow problem! WHERE ARE YOUR SHOES? WHERE DID YOU HAVE THEM LAST! WHY AREN’T THEY IN THE HALL? At that point, you give up on the shoes you want to wear and settle for ones that pinch your toes. Wholly unnecessary drama. Three small actions would have changed everything, and it’s totally true…it takes more time to clean up than to put things where they belong.
Run The Damn Dishwasher
Previous to the tiny one, I always made sure that the dishwasher was 100% full before running it. Big mistake every time. I would forget about the contents and then “discover” them once they had begun to smell (usually when running late because my damn frying pan is dirty!) or it was never used!
Nowadays I make sure to run the dishwasher every night (within reason). My family definitely produces enough dishes to run it daily…and a little extra space never killed anyone. What this simple act does for me (along with making sure the sink is empty and clean before bed) is amazing. I am able to start the day positively (clean slate, my husband feels this way about a made bed…a piece of adult life that I refuse to adopt), easily make my nutritious breakfast, and, as I have more time in the morning from doing that, I can make new bottles of milk for the day ahead. Win!
Be Partners
It should go without saying that being on the same page as your partner is an advantage, but as a parent it is essential. When we are at our best, my husband and I regroup regularly. We keep each other informed of all upcoming events, daily goals, etc. and we even maintain a shared calendar with little things like…flush the boiler (we live in Maine, and this is essential for boiler life), bath the baby, someone is visiting…and it helps us so much!
Arguably, these tips could help anyone who wants a little more time in their day, but trust me, the motivation comes more easily once you have a baby because your time is crazy limited….more than it ever has been before.
Somehow, it has made me more efficient. So…I guess, thanks, baby?